Monday, November 23, 2015



you dont even get a dearest.
you are a foul human being.
im not even sure why you get a post at all.
but ive gotta get it out.
all the hate and hurt.
its got to come out.

you are a gross. gross. gross. person.
gross isnt a gross enough word for you.

you cheat on your wife.
destroy your family.
destroy everything within your reach.
all because you are a selfish, lust filled, jerk.

i dont even know the havoc that you put
   the people that supported you through.

but im assuming you hurt them too.
thats just you, you leave a trail of destruction everywhere you go.

you move to portland.
you come to us.
the vast majority, welcome you.
i did. much to my dismay. i did.

you reap the consequences of your actions.
you work a terrible job.
are homeless. 

i let your disgusting self sleep on my couch.
i gave you $200 when you had nothing.
not for any credit or glory for myself.
but because you were my friend.

my mom asked you to help us move.
she told you that she couldnt afford to pay you.
and she couldnt. neither could i.
she couldnt have afforded to put gas in allens truck either.
but you didnt know that.
you only were worried about yourself.
only worried about your rebellion

allen and billie were a light for us.
when you were off destroying a family.
billie was packing my house.
allen was giving us money to pay for gas ourselves.
because august and september were terrible months for us.

putting a little gas in his truck was the only way she knew to pay him back.
you havent been there for us. 
you havent done anything for my mom.
you havent done anything but destroy.

when you told her that she could pay you, 
i almost said something.
because that was, again, disgusting.
but i needed her to know,
what i already knew.

you are a dirtbag.
a filthy, nasty, dirtbag.

i wont even get into the headphones.
but i will add another adjective.
a filthy, nasty, greedy, dirtbag.

lets move on to how you destroyed another group of people.
you preyed on a vulnerable girl.
     (several of them in fact. ew.)
i, myself, told you that the adult was just looking for love.
you preyed on her. 
you took advantage of her.

you took her away from her family.
of the only woman who has been there for her.
since her birth.

her 'dad', whilst he was a willing participant in the making.
has not been a dad for her, her whole life.
did she not tell you of the time he left them at the convience store?
did she not tell you of the time where they had to move from their house in hours.
of the abuse. of the disgusting things he did.
so you, push her towards him.
because he would do anything to hurt her mother.
and being with you. a nasty, sleezy, slimeball is just the ticket.

was this a game to you?
my best friend told her dad.
that you were in fact a slimeball.
you didnt get a license.

are you trying to make them pay?
i wonder if this is a game to you.

not only did you hurt her family.
your games hurt her ex.
they hurt his family.
they hurt many relationships.

people supported you.
people were there for you.
and her mom was standing for truth.
not being ugly. 
not being hurtful.
but she stood for truth.

and you threw all that destruction away.
to destroy another family.
to destroy a child.

you have a daughter.
how. could. you.
how would you feel?
how. could. you.

why her?
did she have the same vulnerable look on her face?
this new path of destruction that you caused.
has caused a lot of hurt.

you hurt an adult.
this adult is blaming the child. 
this adult is hurt herself, and spewing hurt at a child.
this child has a family.
that is being hurt by the adult.
this adult has a family that is being hurt by the situation.
this adult has hurt her grandma. (no worries on that one in my eyes)
this adult is trying to gain victory.

but she is an adult tangled in the same pattern.
you killed this adult.
she will rise. 
im hoping that she will rise for good this time.
she took a big blow.
God can work it out.

how could you have wanted her back.
how could you.

this child.
this beautiful.

there is a very big difference in

there is a big difference in 
seventeen & three hundred and sixty days.
and eighteen. 

a big moral difference for a man of thirty one.

this child.
you hurt her.
you hurt her family.
you hurt her church.
you hurt her other church.
you hurt her youth group.
you hurt her friends.
you hurt her extended family.
you hurt everyone you touch.

im assuming finding out you are a pedophile.
hurt your wife again.
she probably wonders if her children are safe.
i know, that i do.
half of me knows they will be.
half of me knows you wont hurt them.
but the half of me that knows youre sleezy.
worries for them.

thats why im glad the police were called.
so hopefully, you can never have full custody.
hopefully, your sleeziness wont rub off on them. 

you are a pitiful excuse for a man.
you dont deserve happiness.
you dont deserve anything but misery.
you dont deserve anything but these same things happening to you.
but i would never wish that on your wife.
or your beautiful babies.